I mean, seriously, heels are a killer!
And stilettos? Oh man, you've got to be kidding! They look gorgeous but I swear I'm gonna break my ankle one of these days. I can't balance on those things to save my life.
I'm about as good for heels as a porcupine is for a shirt!
Animals should definitely not wear clothing - but Amies should definitely not wear heels!
But seriously, finding balance in my life is a continual challenge, especially when it comes to writing. I never knew how much work went into promotion and social networking before I signed my contract. Some days I don't get any writing done because I'm working on all the backstage stuff - my networking. Maybe if I'd known beforehand I would have made sure I cloned myself first.
So, I do my networking on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. (Do you like how I snuck that in there?) And I'm getting quite good at it! But alas, I end up with remorse because I know I should be writing. Then I binge on chocolate, which only gives me eaters remorse. Not to mention heartburn. And a few extra pounds on the derriere.
When my kids come home they wonder what I've done all day and can't seem to understand when I tell them I have to write. So they chat my ear off while I shoo them away. That's when mom guilt kicks into high gear. So I abandon my work and bake them cookies.
At which point, in order to be a good mom, I have to eat a few cookies with them. They remind me "Don't forget the milk!" So we chat with cookies and milk and my mind wanders to all the work I still have to do on my manuscript....My eye scans the stack of dishes, the mound of laundry and the paperwork piled a mile high.
I can't help but wonder when the heck the house became an amusement park for a derranged family of primates!
Now I've got eaters remorse, mom guilt and housework horror!
The only remedy is more cookies.
Who cares about that flab around my waistline?! There's always tomorrow to work that off!
Tomorrow - yes, tomorrow I shall write. My manuscript shall shine 'like the top of the Chrysler building' and I will bask in the glow of its greatness.
After washing that stack of dishes, folding the several loads of accumulated laundry and paying overdue bills, I go to bed exhausted.
The next morning, I pry my eyes open and crawl out of bed. I feel more like someone who battled ninjas in my sleep than a well-rested queen of the palace, even if the rugs do need a shampoo.
Still, I get breakfast, drag the kids to school and think about exercising but decide I don't have the energy. I open my laptop. There's a few dozen emails waiting my reply, tweets to answer and facebook statuses to catch up on. As I stare at the work ahead of me I can't help but wonder how so much accumulated in the 6 hours that I slept. I begin to wonder if my friends are vampires and judge myself for not being able to pull off a 24 hour shift at all, let alone every single day.
The day passes in a blur of emails, phone calls, tweets and statuses. My kids walk through the door after a long day at school, dinner begs to be cooked, dishes call my name (as do those cookies) and hubby is looking for his Kindle. Again. We eat, do homework and go to bed.
Tomorrow it starts all over.
By Friday I'm applauding myself for not throwing my laptop out the window. It's a miracle the house hasn't been condemned. The kids are still thriving, even though they've eaten boxed mac n' cheese four nights in a row. So I may not have gotten any writing done, but we've all survived - fed and clothed.
I step on the scale. My middle might still be doughy but the numbers have been kind.
I smile at my success.
And that's how I find my balance. What about you?
(For a great post on writers who HAVE found balance, you'll want to check out this post here.)
ps - in case you missed the rafflecopter update - the winner of The Great Cinderskella Giveaway #2 (a copy of The Robe of Skulls) is Niki Moss!